For When That Day Comes…

 

NOTE:

This post is different.  Very different and very personal.  It is not one of my typical posts.  It is a poem. I haven’t written poetry in years, but I was inspired to do it. Although a somber subject, I believe it has a positive message. This message was put on my heart and as hard as it was to share something so personal, I felt called to do so.  As someone who has been forced to face my own mortality, I wanted to share some lessons I learned from my experience.  I learned to focus on what really matters … and I am learning to let go of what doesn’t.  Always a work in progress, but with God’s help, I am getting better at it.

I want to preface this post by saying that I am doing well.  For my family and friends, there is no reason to worry. My last scans were stable and my treatment is still working.  Still, knowing that I will not have as much time on this earth as I hoped; I often think about when that day comes.  It may be upsetting to some; but, honestly, looking into the future forces me to look at my present.

And that is where our focus should always be.

This is dedicated to all those who are suffering today, and to all those who are rallying around those who are suffering.  This is dedicated to those whose time is uncertain, and to those who are pleading for a little more time with their loved ones.  This is dedicated to those who have lost loved ones, who may not have had the chance to say goodbye, to apologize, or to make peace with their loss. May God’s love and peace surround you.

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Rejoice always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances. For this is God’s Will for you in Christ Jesus.

(1 Thes 5:16-18)

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For when that day comes…

 

Let me remember the days of my childhood,

Before this world set to tear me apart.

Let me remember the joy of those times,

The innocence, and a not-yet broken heart.

 

Let me remember the sun on my face,

Bare feet on the blades of grass.

How big and blue the sky was,

Oh, those days went by so fast.

 

Let me remember the summers of youth,

When my only charge was to play.

The woods, the pond, the corn fields, and creek,

What adventures awaited each day.

 

Sprawled out in the yard, looking up at the sky,

As the birds and bees took flight.

Days of sprinklers, and earthworms, and crab apple wars,

Fireflies and crickets filled the night.

 

A home full of love and laughter,

No softer place could I fall.

A childhood filled with wonder,

Loved by the greatest parents of all.

 

Lazy days on Grandma’s porch,

Sharing that old wooden swing.

Talking and laughing and passing the time,

Oh, what sweet memories bring.

 

For when that day comes…

 

Let me remember the growing years,

Filled with fun and frolic and friends.

Wide-eyed and ready to take on the world,

With no thought how my story would end.

 

Diplomas and dances and a license to drive,

Spilling over with hopes and dreams.

Successes and failures and bumps in the road,

This world not always as it seemed.

 

Broken hearts and broken trust,

Losses and storms, how they came.

Picked up the pieces and still forged ahead,

Still, the heart never beat quite the same.

 

For when that day comes….

 

Let me remember that walk down the aisle,

On that warm September day.

When two hearts became just one,

And together we’d face come what may.

 

We worked in the city and played at the shore,

We built a house and made it a home.

We shared a life that most only dreamed,

But we ached for a child of our own.

 

We prayed and we waited and prayed some more,

In His time, those prayers were answered.

A girl then a boy within the calendar year.

Our hearts forever captured.

 

For when that day comes…

 

Let me remember the lullabies,

The crayons, the bubbles, the joy.

Chaos was constant, the house was a mess,

But what love brought this girl and this boy.

 

Living room forts and trips to the zoo,

Play dates and ball games and more.

Running on empty and meals on the go,

Our schedule could fit no more.

 

The children they grow up so very fast,

It all was a constant blur,

Closing my eyes, I can see it now,

In slow motion, those memories stir.

 

For when that day comes…

 

Careers and ambitions, the pursuit of more,

The workhorse was saddled and ready.

No rest for the weary, keep your eye on the prize,

And hold that bridle steady.

 

Then out of the blue, came a thundering blow,

Life as I knew it slipped from my hand.

But when the ground fell out from under me,

God’s strength taught me once again to stand.

 

God met me in my brokenness,

God worked upon my heart.

My suffering, His Master Plan,

And I was humbled to play my part.

 

For when the day comes…

 

Let me remember the simpler days,

The moments that seemed so ordinary.

The laughs over dinner, the fun times that we shared,

Now, such sweet memories we carry.

 

The days flew by quick and the years flew by quicker,

But snapshots still pressed into mind.

The birthdays and celebrations were special,

But those everyday moments, the best kind.

 

The pancake mornings and meals off the grill,

The homework and trips to the mall.

The chocolate chip cookies, the crumbs and the spills,

Oh, how I remember it all.

 

For when that day comes…

 

I won’t remember the long work days,

Or the difficult times I faced.

I won’t remember the falls and the failure,

For life was not meant to be a race.

 

I won’t remember the fights and squabbles,

The words said in anger and fear.

Only the love and the times that were shared,

With the ones I hold so dear.

 

I won’t remember that day in the office,

When the doctor told me the news.

I won’t remember the hours spent shackled,

Chained to a bag and a bunch of tubes.

 

I won’t remember material things,

Like houses and jewelry and cars,

No need for a suitcase, no need for a bag,

My home is ready and waiting in the stars.

 

I won’t remember the trouble life brought me,

The sadness and the despair.

I won’t remember the pain in your face,

For that is just too much to bear.

 

For when that day comes…

 

I won’t remember the breathless gasps, the pain-filled sighs,

or the slumber that went on for days.

I won’t remember the hushed voices, the weeping cries,

Or solemn faces seen through a haze.

 

I won’t remember the sleepless nights, the desperate pleas,

Or the sting of that terrible news.

I won’t remember any less-than-perfect days,

Of this life I was about to lose.

 

For when that day comes….

 

Let me remember the happy times,

The fellowship, the friendship, the love.

Let me remember the blessings given to me,

By my God, in Heaven above.

 

Let me remember a life well-lived,

As I take my final breath.

This will just be goodbye for now,

For new life comes in death.

 

I will close my eyes one last time on earth,

And in Heaven, they will reopen.

I will be free from pain and suffering,

No longer trapped in this body, broken.

 

Oh, when that day comes, will you promise me…

You won’t stay sad for long.

Miss me a little, remember me a lot,

But know I am where I belong.

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“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award me to that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing. 

(2 Timothy 4:7-8)